gardeningaia | Voice & Action

[ There's a fib of a Feather under the shade of the barracks after noon; she's got the sundress on, but Aerith is undoubtedly not new. She knows where she is, and after she gets past the jolt of terror that strikes when that last painful blow is remembered, she knows why she is there. She's plenty upset, and she's also angry and tense as she returns to house #41, keeping near the side of the street and under the cover of buildings for the brisk walk. She'll stop if a friend calls to her, but otherwise make a quick excuse and keep going; she really, really wants to go back to what's become her home here.

After stopping in at the house and checking in with her housemates--and letting herself have a good cry to help get it out--she goes and makes a journal post from her bedroom.

She takes a big, deep breath, first. ]

I'm back... this is Aerith. I hope no one [ else ] was worried, but it's... better now. I'm back. I'm not hurt.

...Is it...normal to see nothing when you die? Like you just stop... I'm sorry, ignore that. What a stupid thing to talk about!

[ ...It doesn't help to keep thinking about it right now. As she handles any responses that come, Aerith goes and does something extremely mundane and calming for her. She checks on all the flowers, at home, at the flower shop, and at the memorial garden, with the wolf Daisy close by her side. He's being more protective than usual right now. ]

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[ There's a look on Aerith's face that's not quite panic, but very clearly surprise of the unpleasant sort, before she says decidedly: ]

I don't want to talk about that.

[ So the answer is yes--but it's not open for discussion. ]

I just thought I should say something. I know I... disappeared on everyone.

--Have you been OK, Ami?

I'm sorry; I didn't mean to upset you. I just thought you might need some help.

I'm not upset. [ ...she's so lucky she's no pinocchio when she gives kneejerk reactions like that. ] ...Anyway, thank you, Ami. I should be okay. I didn't lose anything that important.

Everything about you is important. [That might sound... trite or silly, but she means it. Every piece makes up the whole person.]

I know. I know, but...[ She doesn't want to think about this, or what she could have lost instead. ] It's just I can't feel heat, looks like. [ Or cold. She hasn't figured that out yet. ] That might get tricky sometimes, but I can handle it.

Be especially careful with the stove. You could burn yourself without realizing it.

[ She smiles with a soft exhale, some of the tension loosening as she finds amusement. Good old Ami, so practical. ] I hadn't thought about that. And I do most of the cooking. But that's not going to stop me. I'll have to keep my mind on what I'm doing... this isn't going to change what I do. [ She wants to be sure of that. She's not changing her routine because of what happened, or what's been taken from her. ]

[She can't help it, really. Her mind just works that way.]

Mm. As long as you're clear-headed, it will be fine.

[ ...That probably means she shouldn't cook today, but that's fine. She doesn't feel like it anyway, and someone must have taken up cooking while she was gone. ]

I can manage that.

I can still come over if you need some help, too. Just tell me.

No. I... want to do things by myself. They didn't take anything that big from me. [ And she's stubborn. That's not changing. ] But thank you for offering.

I think it's good to be independent like that. But just for the future, when you do need it, I think it's good to let your friends help you, too.

[She'd been wrong all that time, not to trust them to.]

[ She's quiet, thinking about that. When she needs it... she had needed it before.

If she'd brought someone with her... would she have lived? ]

Aerith? Is it alright?

Oh...! Yes, it's all right. I was thinking about what you said.

It's just what I think. [She doesn't present it as absolute truth.]

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